04/01/2010 by yourgreatlife.

How do you find the support you need for your infertility?  Regardless of how you came to be infertile or what your goal, it can be a challenge to find someone who not only empathizes with your situation, but also is prepared to be there for you on either an emotional or practical level. You may wonder why, for something so fundamental to your happiness, someone wouldn’t want to be counted in your support network. 

Why You May Not Be Getting the Support You Need from Logical Sources

1. They believe that you must be responsible for your infertility somehow.
2. Your partner is ambivalent about becoming a father or mother.
3. You want to be a single parent.
4. You are not married to your partner.
5. You are in a gay relationship and they believe every child needs a father
6. They are infertile also and worry they will lose you to a baby and mom-friends.
7. It’s your boss. Doctor appointments and maternity leave will inconvenience them.
8. People think you should be grateful that you already have one child.
9. They are jealous of the attention and sympathy you get for your infertility.
10. They are too wrapped up in their own life to realize you need them.

Those people may not realize they are being unsupportive. What is obvious to you may not occur to them.  An example:  your mother phoning you daily with details of her friend’s daughter’s pregnancy.  “What do you mean? I thought you would be happy for her.” Or, someone may think if you needed them you would ask and you haven’t.

They may be judgmental.  “Well if she hadn’t (pick one) a) taken such a stressful job, b) had that abortion years ago, c) waited so long or d) gained so much weight, she wouldn’t be in this situation now.” In fact, almost the entire list comes from people judging you and your condition by their own values, rather than stepping into your shoes to think what it must be like to be you.  However, you may be able to turn their attitude around.

First, look at your own responsibility for the situation and take ownership of it.  In that way, you will be less likely to assign blame, feel resentment and put other people on the defensive.

1. Have you failed to let people know about your infertility? (Most can’t read minds.)
2. Have you made it so much a part of your identity that you sound like a broken record?
3. Have you not been there for them when they needed your support?
4. Have you isolated yourself from all your friends who have children?
5. Have you held back on congratulations toward a sister-in-law, cousin or colleague who has had a baby?
6. Did you previously fail to show empathy toward someone else who was infertile?
7. Do you whine too much?
8. Have you lost your perspective?
9. Have you made sex seem like a chore, obliterating the romance and passion in the bedroom?

If you don’t keep up your work, friendships, social or sport activities, you may become “out of sight, out of mind.” If you no longer accept invitations, people may assume you no longer want or need their company.  Though it may seem logical to you and very unfair to compare the situations, a friend who has had a difficult pregnancy or birth, postnatal depression, has a colicky baby or has had a miscarriage, may feel that you have not supported her when she needed you.  It isn’t your friend’s fault that you haven’t yet had a baby of your own.  Messages can be misconstrued and feelings hurt on both sides.  All relationships need to be nurtured in order to thrive, so give to get.

How to Find The Right Kind of Support

The trick to getting support is to first list the type of support you need, and then identify who can provide it.  For example:

• Someone who will listen and keep it confidential
• Go with me to the doctor
• Someone who’s also infertile and knows what it’s like
• Friends I can go out with, to forget my problems
• Cover my workload when I need time off
• Friend(s) who won’t need an explanation or take it personally when I opt out of get-togethers and baby showers
• Give me my injections  
• Pass the word so that I don’t have to get into it 10 times a day
• Friend who will rescue me from upsetting conversations
• Help me with my food and fitness plans

Now, split your list of needs into two, under the headings: emotional support and practical support. Connect the tasks with the names of people you know. Then ask yourself a very important question: “Is it reasonable for me to expect this person to provide this support.”  Consider:

1.     your relationship

2.     their nature (sensitivity, generosity, etc…)

3.     their availability

4.     their reliability

Next, look at acquaintances in an outer layer of your life.  A colleague at work may also be trying to conceive.  You may click with a nurse at the clinic.  That other woman you always see in the RE’s waiting room may be happy to go for a coffee. A friend of a friend may have had the treatment you are considering and be happy to answer your questions. Reach out when you feel strong enough or the need is big enough. Infertility seems like a personal or sensitive subject that people may wait for you to bring up the conversation. So go for it; you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

When No One Close at Hand Will Do - Infertility forums are wonderful resources for information, camaraderie and supportive conversations.  They all have a “personality” of their own, so cruise them for a few days to figure out which one is a good fit for you.  There are also hundreds of blogs written by infertile women (and a few by men) to which you can subscribe.  Again, cruise the blogs until you find an appropriate few, keeping in mind that they are the product of someone else’s personal experiences, attitude and knowledge level.  After a little while, if you keep reading and commenting on the forum(s) or blog(s) of your choice, you will feel a part of that community.  Be careful though not to take someone else’s experience or opinion as valid medical advice unless they are medically qualified.  Always check with the doctor treating you before trying anything that may interfere with or delay your chances of treatment.

Professional Support - Last, but not least, there is an advantage in having a specialist fertility coach if you are not coping well with your infertility.  The criteria to look for in a coach include training, rapport between the two of you and their ability to teach and motivate you to achieve the positive changes you are after. While coaches don’t absolutely need to have personal experience with a client’s issues to be effective, I believe that it is a genuine advantage in the area of fertility coaching. A fertility coach who has herself had difficulty conceiving, will have an authentic understanding of the emotional, physical, financial and social aspects of the fertility rollercoaster ride.

There is plenty of evidence that your state of mind can affect your fertility.  If you are overly stressed, feeling negative, comfort-eating, arguing with your partner or not sleeping, you are not creating the best possible state of wellbeing for conception, pregnancy and childbirth.  A fertility coach will look at the whole person to determine which small changes in your attitudes, actions and lifestyle will make a difference to your overall wellbeing.  From that better place, you will work together to find the best way to create and build your family. By aligning your goals with your value system, your coach may also be able to help you determine whether to undergo or continue fertility treatment, if and when to stop trying to conceive, end fertility treatment or consider an alternative path to parenting, such as egg or sperm donation, surrogacy or adoption.

In the end, it’s your choice of how open or private you will be about your infertility and that will directly affect what kind of support you receive.  Just remember support comes in many forms and from many places and sometimes must be earned. Be understanding; over time, supporters can be more or less active in your life as their own circumstances change.  Giving support is not a job description; it’s a gift.

Lisa Marsh is the fertility coach  and owner of Your Great Life in Stanmore, North London.  For more information about her, go to http://yourgreatlife.co.uk. Subscribe to her blog at http://yourgreatlife.typepad.com or to arrange a coaching session, in person or via telephone, please contact her at 020 8954 2897 or lisa@yourgreatlife.co.uk. 

You can also follow Lisa at http://twitter.com/yourgreatlife for helpful Fertility and Miscarriage Support Tips, as well as other information about news in the field of women’s reproductive health.

Posted in fertility coach, Life Coaching, Fertility & stress, Fertility Blogger, Support for infertility, Fertility Experts, Guest blogger, Infertility, Fertility, Friendship & support, lifestyle and fertility, Fertility Advice | 4 Comments »

25/11/2009 by yourgreatlife.

Have you considered your weight as one of the possible obstacles to your dreams of having a baby? This isn’t about being fat or skinny; no judgment about your appearance is being made. Your weight can play a significant part in the ability of your body to ovulate, produce quality eggs and maintain a healthy pregnancy, especially if you are extremely underweight or overweight.  

You may already have some idea about your weight’s impact on your reproductive system if you have had irregular menstrual periods, the onset of a thyroid condition or polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS) or vitamin deficiencies.  What you may not know is that very overweight or underweight women have a much lower chance of conceiving, even with fertility treatment. As a result, many fertility specialists won’t take on a patient who wouldn’t benefit as much from their help and/or whose unsuccessful treatment would affect their success ratings.  

Many clinics will use your weight, or Body Mass Index (BMI), as criteria for accepting you as a patient.  There is no hard and fast rule on this because one athletic woman with developed musculature can weigh more and carry less fat than another woman of similar age and height.  BMI of 19 – 24 is considered normal and 25 – 29 overweight. If either your weight or BMI falls under 19 or above 29, you may encounter a delay in being accepted for treatment, with instructions to lose or gain weight before coming back.  Whether you are still trying to become pregnant naturally, or if fertility treatment is your next step and your weight is a possible issue, here are some steps that you can follow to move forward with your family plan.  

Your Attempts to Conceive Keep notes, not only of your weight, but also how often you have a period and how often and when you have sexual intercourse without the use of contraceptive devices. There are books available that provide a structure for tracking essential information for fertility, but any journal or notebook will do. 

Identify Your Obstacles See your doctor to identify whether your current weight is a possible obstacle to conception. You must be forthcoming about your pattern of weight gain and loss, your eating habits and any extreme dieting or exercising you have done, even if you find these topics embarrassing.  You may be tested for high or low blood pressure, thyroid function, diabetes, vitamin and mineral deficiencies and the level of oestrogen you are producing.  

Eating Disorders Serious eating disorders such as anorexia, bulimia, and extreme compulsive overeating require medical supervision, structured programs and counselling over a lengthy period to ensure and support recovery. Anorexia and obesity can both affect ovarian function adversely and bulimia is linked to PCOS, so pregnancy is unlikely, though not impossible. If you do conceive while battling an eating disorder, it could impact negatively upon the baby’s ability to thrive as well as your own health. Think about everything you eat and drink passing to the baby in your womb, though in a slightly different form. Not only nutrients are taken in by the baby, but also the high calorie/ high sugar and high fat content of your less nutritious food.   

Recovery from an eating disorder can be a long and difficult process; it’s not only about what you eat, but also why you eat it that needs to be determined.  The destructive cycle of thought and behaviour has to be broken and relearned in a positive way.  The baby will be dependant upon you and require a fully present parent. 

Eating disorders actually require an enormous amount of mental energy, planning the next binge, the next purge (self-induced vomiting) or how to avoid eating without anyone else noticing.  These disorders are nearly always accompanied by some degree of self-hatred. Dissatisfaction with the sufferer’s appearance, social relationships and/or self-belief fuels the fire and that brings on more irrational and dangerous behaviour. 

If you think, or know, that you have an undiagnosed eating disorder, don’t waste a minute before you consult a doctor.  I am not minimizing the difficulty in admitting it to oneself; it will take courage and commitment. 

Your GP can probably refer you to a specialist medical unit where counselling  and other practical assistance is offered.  There are also many groups where you can meet with people who have experienced similar disorders and receive confidential support.  

Lifestyle Changes for Self-CareYour health is vital before, during and after you conceive, carry and deliver your baby.  You can’t breathe a sigh of relief upon conceiving and then let yourself go to pot.  Bad habits don’t disappear overnight, so get working on them immediately. 

If your current weight is due to poor diet, lack of exercise, smoking or over-consumption of alcohol, a nutritionist and an experienced personal trainer can advise on necessary changes in your lifestyle.  This is no time for a crash diet or the use of over-the-counter weight-loss or weight-gain drugs or powdered drink mixes. Don’t put all of yourself into a weight-loss or weight-gain scheme just to win the approval of your RE, only to let it all go back the way it had been afterward.  Careless indulgence in bad habits means that you aren’t prioritizing self-care.   

How fit you are will also determine how you carry a pregnancy.  Over the nine months, you may be carrying anywhere between 18 and 45 extra pounds, putting extra pressure on your skin, muscles, veins, spine, breasts and joints.  Stretch marks only mar the surface of your body, but varicose veins can result from carrying too much weight and excess blood flow during pregnancy and knee trouble is quite common in obese women.  That’s just during pregnancy. 

Then comes the aftermath: life with baby.  Think about how often mothers  have to bend over, crouch down on the floor, get in and out of the car or bus, lift car seats and play cots and balance a baby on one hip.   If you were quite overweight before conceiving, and continue your poor habits, you could easily find yourself 75 to 100 pounds above your optimal weight before you give birth.   

Trading One Habit for Another Keep in mind that what you ingest (not just food) during pregnancy and breastfeeding, your baby will too. Do not consider turning to cigarettes, alcohol or caffeinated, artificially sweetened soft drinks to help you avoid eating.  Nicotine and damaged lung tissue stay in your system for a very long time.  Smoking itself can cause low birth weight and nicotine addiction in newborns.  Alcohol could result in your baby being born with Foetal Alcohol Syndrome, which could cause low birth weight, developmental problems or epilepsy among other symptoms that could affect him for life. The soft drinks will just fill you up, make you gassy and add no nutrition relative to the volume you consume.  Since you need extra nutrients for optimal health at conception, don’t waste space on junk drinks. 

Your Motivation Finding the motivation to change your behaviour should be simple because you already have a goal in mind. You want to become pregnant and give birth to a healthy baby. Use that goal as motivation to change your attitudes and behaviour.  Think of yourself as a healthy vessel for conceiving, carrying and then caring for your child. When you are on the verge of bingeing, skipping a meal or eating junk food, consider how that would impact upon your weight and health and ultimately upon your attempts to conceive. 

Your Plan Bad habits take a long time to embed, so they are not going to change over night. If you and your doctor believe that you can make positive weight changes yourself, formulate your own structured plan. Write down your:  

• specific weight,
• a realistic time frame,
• a list of quality foods in moderate quantities and
• the exercise you will do to boost your health and strength
• other healthy strategies to achieving your goal weight.

Keep track of your efforts and your achievements as you move toward your goal. While there may be other obstacles to conceiving a healthy pregnancy, if you persevere, you will have eliminated weight as one of them.  

Lisa Marsh is a qualified life coach in
London, UK, specializing in Fertility and Miscarriage Support. She is dedicated to educating and supporting men and women concerned with reproductive health, infertility, fertility treatment and all forms of family building. 

To find out more about Lisa and her work as a fertility coach, visit her blog at http://yourgreatlife.typepad.com/.  She can be contacted at 020 8954 2897 or lisa@yourgreatlife.co.uk  for coaching, article writing or speaking engagements. You can also follow her on Twitter for Fertility and Miscarriage Support Tips at http://twitter.com/yourgreatlife .

Posted in Weight loss, fertility coach, Fertility & weight, female fertility, PCOS, Fertility, Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, Fertility Advice | 2 Comments »

13/07/2009 by yourgreatlife.

An Essential Of Fertility Treatment Is Choosing The Right Doctor For You 

A key ingredient to a positive experience with fertility treatment is a good relationship with your doctor and his/her medical team from your GP to your RE.  Perhaps more than any other medical treatment, fertility treatment delves into the most intimate areas of your life.  From your first enquiry about difficulty conceiving, you step into a different relationship with them than when you were in for general health checks.  The focus may be on your reproductive health; however, to varying degrees you are inviting them to be part of your hopes and dreams.  As time goes on, you will entrust them, from the receptionist up to the specialist, with details of your values, spiritual beliefs, the strength of your relationship, your views on and knowledge of sex, birth control, procreation, parenthood, and so much more.  You will be phoning frequently for appointments, lab tests, scans, results, advice and simply to ensure that they don’t forget your life has turned upside down. 

Depending upon your age (+/- 35) and medical history, the question of your fertility may have been completely unexpected.  Even if you are a positive sort, the threat to such a fundamental part of your being, your images of the future and your relationship may lead to thoughts such as “What’s wrong with me?”  “What did I do wrong?” or “Why us?” Hopefully, your doctor has enough experience and sensitivity to anticipate this and will explain the next set of investigations or results in a way that turns your panic into measured concern.  Actually, I might as well say it right now:  you must step forward and meet the doctor more than halfway. Leave embarrassment, shame, guilt and anxiety at the door as they will do you no good and the stress they cause may actually harm your chances of becoming pregnant. 

Infertility takes conception, which should be a natural function, out of your control. For many women, that loss of control is deeply uncomfortable, and even frightening.  I have seven years’ experience of ups and downs in this area, with a combination of recurrent miscarriage and periods of infertility.  I’ll admit to periods of pure numbness, and then heartache, followed later by many glass-half-empty tears.  My GP seemed wholly indifferent to my plight. I wasn’t offered further medical investigations, treatment or counselling.  Why didn’t I change doctors?  Somehow, while I was adventurous and outspoken in other parts of my life, I lost my voice when it was a question of my fertility. I can only conclude that, with infertility looming like a big, dark cloud above me, I felt too vulnerable to assert my needs.  

My response, as an American used to private healthcare, was to ask women friends for a recommendation, then dig deep in my pockets to pay for the services of a Harley Street consultant.  I realise that not everyone would be willing or able to cough up all their holiday, Christmas and rainy-day funds, however, if it matters enough for you to know more about your condition, overcome it and to become pregnant, do anything you can to find the right doctor for you, whether NHS or private.  A sad truth of our fertility and physical stamina is that time will eventually run out and you don’t want to have regrets that you didn’t do everything you could have to create your family.  (Yes, I am aware that a 66 year old woman has just had her first child, but seriously, do you want that to be you?). With today’s search engines, researching each fertility doctor and clinic you are considering for success rates, good standing with their professional association and the number of times they have performed certain procedures is so easy now. If you make an informed choice and use your instincts, you will be paid back with peace of mind and trust. 

So, you have reached a point where you need medical assistance to conceive.  Maybe, you have a short-list of fertility specialists and clinics within a reasonable distance (Or not. I went abroad for my IVF.)  Here are a few tips to help you choose a medical team and achieve and maintain a good relationship with them.   

• Look everywhere (your doctor, insurance company, friends of friends, internet fertility forums, etc…) for recommendations of a good reproductive endocrinologist (RE) and clinic.

• Think about whether you and your partner respond better to male or female doctors. This may affect your ability to talk openly and honestly, endure frequent physical examinations or trust their opinions.

• Ask if you will always see your preferred doctor.  If not, ask to meet the other doctors before agreeing anything.  Burning with resentment at an appointment will interfere with your sense of well-being and your relationship to the staff.

• Educating yourself about your condition makes “hearing” your doctor that much easier and takes the edge off your anxiety.  However, don’t trip over the doctor’s toes with unqualified self-diagnosis.

• Do not be afraid to go for a second opinion. An experienced, confident doctor will understand that you have difficult decisions to make.

• Try to identify each person as friend or foe (for instance, the dragon lady who answers the phone or guards the appointments schedule; it’s her job) and find ways to get them in your corner.  Be conscious about your demeanour; pleasant, patient and worried goes a lot further than impatient, aggressive or hysterical.

• Be bold. In the waiting room, ask other patients if they have been happy with the medical practice and if they have any tips for you.

• Whether you choose the most sought-after doctor in the field or someone out of the public eye, you should expect his full attention and compassion during your appointment, but understand that he may not have extra time for chatting and hand-holding.

• The medical and non-medical staff at the RE’s office may display a professional demeanour that masks real caring. They can’t get emotionally involved with each couple. Be content with friendliness and patience when you have questions or a few tears.

• If the fertility clinic offers counselling or coaching for your emotional well-being, take advantage of it! This may very well provide the empathy, attention and support to balance out the doctor’s more scientific approach.

• If, after you have begun with one doctor, you are not comfortable with anything from his bedside manner to the distance from your home or workplace, find someone else.  Don’t stress out.

• The best thanks you could give your doctor is a recommendation to other couples. Those baby photos in his office, with joyful commentary from grateful parents, are better marketing material than he could buy.  You may need your RE’s services again someday, so if you recommend him to someone else, ask them to mention it when they meet him.

• The nurses are often there at unreasonably early hours 6 or 7 days a week to allow for patients who have to get to work. A word of appreciation or a bag of croissants won’t go amiss there either.

It is easy to be swept up in the flood of instructions, procedures, an artificially induced cycle, frequent trips to the pharmacy, lessons on self-injecting, an endless list of incomprehensible medical terms and rules of a fertility clinic.  It’s all made more difficult by the high level of emotion that accompanies infertility.  It quickly strips the “trying for a baby” of romantic ideals.  Work on feeling positive, hopeful and supported (perhaps the topic for my next blog).  Central to your fertility plan and within your control, is your choice of doctor’s practice, including his practice manager, receptionist, nurses, and professional support for your emotional well-being.  You should be absolutely convinced that you are all on the same team, wanting the same result and doing everything that can be done to achieve it.  You deserve it.

This post was posted by Lisa Marsh

To find out more about Lisa Marsh of Your Great Life click on the link below

http://yourgreatlife.typepad.com

Posted in Life Coaching, Fertility Services, Fertility Treatment, Fertility Advice | 3 Comments »

12/05/2009 by admin.

What a great idea! Hope this idea takes off in UK to.

Just read this great story online. The link was posted on Twitter.

DENVER — Martinis, manicures, and getting pregnant: the latest approach to talking sex and fertility isn’t happening in a doctor’s office, it’s in a nail salon near you.

Monday night, the drink of choice at Fingers and Toes nail salon in Denver was the “Fertilitini,” a non-alcoholic all-organic martini.

It’s part of a series of “Martini & Manicure” events being held across the country by the American Fertility Association

Here is link to read whole story

http://www.thedenverchannel.com/news/19435094/detail.html

Posted in Fertility, Fertility Advice | 1 Comment »

05/12/2008 by admin.

Just read this article below online. Its by Suzi Godson from the Times 29/11/08

Suzi Godson is also the author of a comprehensive guide to sex book called  The Sex Book 

 I thought it might be a useful reminder.

From The Times

November 29, 2008

10 things you need to know before you try for a baby

Suzi Godson

1. It can take about three months for full fertility to return after giving up the Pill, but some doctors suspect fertility is boosted in the first two weeks after a woman stops taking it.

2. Start taking 400 micrograms of folic acid every day to decrease the risk of neural-tube defects such as spina bifida. Green vegetables such as spinach, kale, broccoli, lettuce and peas are also rich sources of folate.

3. Clean up. Both of you need to cut out fags and alcohol. Steer clear of caffeine, Chinese herbs, herbal remedies and large doses of vitamin A as it can cause birth defects and liver toxicity. Check your vitamin supplements don’t contain vitamin A and steer clear of liver which also contains it in high doses. Also avoid raw or undercooked meat/eggs, soft cheeses and over-the- counter medicines (unless approved by your pharmacist) because they stay in your system and might be harmful if you become pregnant.

4. And shape up. Being overweight or underweight can increase the risk of birth defects or low birth-weight babies. You’ll need a complete check-up, including smears, screening for sexually transmitted infections and outstanding immunisations. Discuss your medical history and blood types with your GP and get yourself to the dentist. Pregnancy can play havoc with your teeth.

5. Know your cycle. Ovulation usually happens about 14 days before the first day of your next period. If your cycle is 28 days, with your period arriving on day one, day 14 is your most fertile day, but if you have a 32-day cycle, ovulation occurs on day 18. If you examine yourself daily, you’ll notice a vaginal discharge that’s transparent and stretchy between your fingers, like egg white, on your most fertile days.

6. Don’t become obsessed. Limiting your sex life to the few specific days each cycle when you think you might be ovulating will kill the spontaneity in your sexual relationship.

7. Instead, try to have sex every other day to ensure a continuous fresh supply of sperm (storing up sperm for longer than three days is detrimental to quality).

8. Have sex the day before you ovulate. Sperm can live for several days inside the body so making love before ovulation occurs gives it time to travel up the Fallopian tubes to lie in wait for the egg.

9. Let gravity lend a hand. Make sure he’s on top and put a pillow under your bum or practise your shoulder stand after he ejaculates.

10. Be patient. For every 100 couples having sex two to three times a week, about 30 will conceive within one month, 60 within six months and 85 will have conceived within one year.

Posted in Getting Pregnant, Fertility Advice, Fertility File, Trying to Conceive | No Comments »

25/11/2008 by admin.

Dr Thomas Stuttaford answers readers questions on maximising fertility for men and women 9/1/08
Times Online .

Very useful & informative in our opinion.

Visit   http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/health/expert_advice/article3159893.ece

Posted in Fertility, Fertility Advice | No Comments »

13/10/2008 by admin.

This is a very honest and open account of the authors experience in freezing her eggs, including her fertility MOT, and all the tests, injections egg extraction and then the final freezing of the eggs

Pending Mr Right’s arrival, I had my eggs frozen. But will putting a baby on hold be worth it?

Fleur Britten

At age 34, I’m having a panic attack. I might be biologically ready for procreation — past ready, even — but, emotionally, I’m committed to my career, not to The One. I’m still asking, which One? I exist in that “30 is the new 20” generation: perfection-seeking, commitment-phobic and no way near ready. But I need to insure against finding myself in a Tracey Emin moment, choked by my childlessness at 40. Twenty-three per cent of women born in 1973 won’t have had children by the time they hit 45. By which time it might be too late. I need to put my fertility on ice, before it runs out on me. So I’m having my eggs frozen.

Click here to read the full story

Posted in IVF, Egg Freezing, Fertility, Fertility Advice, Trying to Conceive, Fertility File, Fertility Tests | No Comments »

06/10/2008 by admin.

Whenever I am trying to conceive I try and make sure we have lots of sex just before , during and after ovulation. Generally this has meant we have unprotected sex 2-3 times over a 3 day period in order to maximise our chances of conceiving.  I read that it is best to have some sperm waiting for the egg as it is released, which is why we do it just before ovulation, as well as during and after.

 I am lucky in that for most of my life I have had a fairly regular cycle of about 27-28 days and find it easy to predict when I will ovulate. This is not as easy if your cycle is erratic.

On a very regular cycle you usually ovulate about 14 days before your period is due 

ie

 if your cycle is 28 days long you ovulate around day 14

if your cycle is a very regular 34 days you ovulate around day 20

if your cycle is a very regular 24 days long you ovulate around day 10

You get the general point

 Unfortunately many of us have erratic cycles & lifestyles ! My cycle has been different at different stages of my life.

In my twenties when I was young and carefree, it was a very regular 27-28 days every month. In my early thirties (before kids) it went down to a very short but thankfully regular 24 days. It was as if my body was trying to increase the chances of me conceiving. Three pregnancies later and in my forties, my cycle is now erratic & anything between 24 days and 34 days. I don’t even bother to write it down any more. It is so unpredicable now.

Posted in Fertility Advice, Sex Education, Trying to Conceive | No Comments »

06/10/2008 by admin.

At what point do I ask for help, is a common question amongst women trying to conceive. I have been researching this, and the common consensus seems to be, that if a couple have been trying to conceive for 12 months without success, they should seek the advice of their doctor.

 However I have also found that there are some exceptions to this-the age of the women is very significant-how long should we leave it if the mother is over a certain age and what is the age ?

From my research, the consensus seems to be, that if the women is over 35 years, and the couple have been trying for 6 months without success, it is advisable to see the GP.

If possible go to see your GP as a couple, and book an appointment for each of you. GP’s are usually quite happy to discuss fertility concerns.

Posted in Fertility Advice, Fertility File | No Comments »